I found this floating around the internet and thought I'd share it with readers of this blog. You may well have seen it before but its well worth a second read and a moment of consideration.
For those readers who have not heard of Viz Magazine I'll explain it thus; its a satirical publication that uses the style of comics such as the Beano and newspapers such as The Sun to poke fun at anything and everything.
They have a famous brace of well known characters and occasionally do a one off strip based on a wide range of things.
Here is one of those...
They sum it up beautifully, don't they?
Orlygg.
Tuesday, 19 June 2012
Fantasy Miniatures: 1989 Golden Demon Extravaganza
Welcome to the second volume of Fantasy miniatures; this time documenting the Gold Demon Awards of 1989. The event took place on Saturday 27th May and was held at the Assembly Rooms, Derby as part of Games Day 1989.
The book contains the best entries of the competition (the third held by GW) as well as the usual work from various studio painters.
Let's have a quick look through the contents shall we...
Introduction by Andy Jones p2-3: This interesting mini article gives an overview to the day. Compare it to last year's attempt and compare!
Studio Staff p4-9: Lots of miniatures by the usual 80s crowd as well as a few choice pieces by Gw's 80s artists Paul Bonner and Dave Andrews. The release of Rogue Trader and Slaves to Darkness is obvious here, with a lot of early RT and Chaos models on show.
Ivan Bartlett p10-11: 1988's winner is analysed along with some other pieces.
The Golden Demon Awards 1989 p12-13: Short article about the competition.
Miniatures Gallery p14-38.
Enjoy the retro action.
Its difficult to choose a favourite this time; so I'll select one from Warhammer and one from Rogue Trader.
Warhammer is best summed up for me on p34 by Dominic Colbeck with his surfing snotling.
Rogue Trader has to be the Techmarine by Ivan Brooke on page 15.
Both very amusing mini dioramas.
Enjoy!
Fantasy-Miniatures-1989
Orlygg.
Dioramadrama: 80s Orc Assaults
Orc Assault by Ivan Bartlett. I love the cut through approach with this diorama as well as all the little details; the corpse in the dungeon, the sappers breaking through, the goblin waiting above the trap door, the artillery... I could go on and on.
It seems that the model makers of 80s Citadel had a particular fondness for assaults involving orcs, or indeed, orks. The goblinoids were the atypical fantasy baddie in days before the 'flavour of the month races or armies' of more modern times.
This is a shame, since there is something deeply insidious about the greenskin, don't you think? By greenskin, I don't mean the massively muscular brute circa 2012, with their moronic, identikit faces but proper orcs, or indeed, orks.
The crooked, gangly characters that ooze a malign but comic disposition. And there is plenty of that character splattered about these wonderful dioramas.
I have a feeling that this one, which makes excellent use of the Mighty Fortress, was built by Dave Andrews. Some of you may recognise it from Warhammer Siege. Lots of lovely citadelesque orcs on display here. I love the crossbow man about to finish off the fallen orc!
Though fantasy, this diorama was constructed for Advanced Heroquest. Ivan Bartlett built the scenery here from clay. I am particularly fond of the the shield designs on the skaven.
Finally, a Mike McVey ork assault from good old Rogue Trader. I love the bloodied orcs!
Hope you enjoy these excellent dioramas as much as the last load I posted. The images got picked up by quite a few other blogs and tumblr accounts- spreading the 3rd edition/Rogue Trader message to the masses.
Enjoy!
Orlygg.
Saturday, 16 June 2012
Leadhead Widows: The Woes of a Wargamer's Wife
My lovely son has spent the evening at my Sister-in-Law's, leaving a little time for my wife and I to spend together. During our long deserved lie in, we began discussing my blog and she began a rant about being a 'Widow to Wargaming'!
During this rather amusing, yet heated, debate she came up with some key issues that blight her life.
As as become the norm, I have constructed a list of the most annoying things that I do (according to my wife, anyway). Are you guilty of any of these crimes against your beloved spouse?
1) Painting Clutter in Lounge
I am sure that you have something similar to this at home. Look at it! Ancient tubs of paint, their lids askew with dried residue, battered, paint splattered brushes (some with only a single bristle) struggle against the serried ranks of unpainted miniatures. The crooked, ever hot lamp, that stands as a silent sentinel over the collection. Blue tack, tissue paper and the stained mugs in which darkened water slowly evaporates under the lamp's scorching gaze. A smart, woven container sullied with battered boxes and who knows what else. For some reason, your child has added one of his balls to the debris! Note the mess has spread to the poor, innocent window sill too!
Wife's Comment: Where is my phone? That table is supposed to be for the internet router and the cordless telephone, not your miniature's crap! You make more mess than the two year old!
2) Reading material in the toilet
This is pretty good for me actually. We have an old issue of WD there alongside a copy of Warhammer Siege. As we all know, the lavatory is the perfect place to absorb the abundant inspiration our old publications provide in peace. Some may call it skivving (my wife certainly does) but to me, this is the research that is so important to my collection, my painting and, of course, this blog. Depending on which project I am working on, the toilet clutter can vary from a few books to a mighty stack of yellowing tomes that smell reassuringly retro.
Wife's Comment: For God's sake shift those books and old magazines, I am sick of seeing them. I going to stuff them in a black rubbish bag if they are still there tonight! How I am supposed to get to my bathroom scales if they're buried under all that crap!
3) Clothes badly hung (or on floor) but magazines perfectly stacked and well cared for.
4) Jam jars full of soaking miniatures
One contains Nitro Moors (for superglue carnage) while the others glisten with the insipid brown of dettol. Who knows what leaden classics these jars contain? Both I and they have long forgotten but from time to time, when whim strikes me, I pluck out a miniature or two and clean them in the kitchen sink. As the bubbled, sticky paint dissolves away and swirls to its doom down the plughole it think, oh, I forgot I'd bought that one! Note how my stripping collection shares space with booze and important spices for cooking!
Again, priorities!
Wife's Comment: How many times do I have to tell you that the kitchen is not for all this crap! What happens if one of the children pick up one of the jars and drinks it? And while we're talking about it, what is with all the bloody bases, toothbrushes and smelly glues?
Oh, is that araldite? Could you just fix my broken vase with that please!
5) Malign influence over children
How many toddlers have their own copy of Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay? Mine does! It shares space alongside Winnie the Pooh, The Tweenies and the Gruffalo. And its not like I encouraged it! He loves to flick through the big, battered book and look at all the pictures. Its amazing how fast children can learn; he knows what an orc is, a knight and even a dark elf!
Clever!
Wife's Comment: He'll have nightmares looking at those awful pictures! That book is so unsuitable! If he likes 'little men' when he grows up I'll lock the pair of you in the garden shed!
6) No one can eat on the dinning room table
The warm hum of the scanner as it saves another classic Warhammer title as a sweet pdf ready to share with enthusiasts the world over. The quality printer and scanner combo (homemade by me) and, of course, the stand of literature ready for the 'next blog'. This is our lounge table in all its glory!
Wife's Comment: This first thing I see when I walked into this room is your mess! Why do we have to have the scanner out all of the time? What is with these piles of magazines that are nearly 30 years old!? Where can I eat my slimming world meal in peace? Tidy it up, this second!
7) Endless parcels and packages delivered every morning
There is no greater way of managing the stressful 21st century lifestyle than returning home after a long day at work to find a few brown paper packages waiting with your name on. Tearing off the paper brings a range of different emotions; excitement, inspiration, nostalgia even lust (if its a particularly rare piece of lead) but they all contribute to a slackening of the shoulders, a release of pressure in the head and a general sense of wellbeing. Now, where is my jam jar full of dettol?
Wife's Comment: Its so embarrassing when I have my mothers' coffee afternoons and there is a huge pile of parcels sitting there. They always say, 'he's been on eBay again, hasn't he?' And there's the postman, knocking on the door and getting me to sign all these orange pieces of paper not to mention all these red cards with 'I'm sorry but we missed you' written on them! When will it stop!?
So, its confession time! How many of these are you guilty of? Or, perhaps, you inflict additional spousal crimes with you passion for retro Warhammer and fantasy games?
Orlygg.
During this rather amusing, yet heated, debate she came up with some key issues that blight her life.
As as become the norm, I have constructed a list of the most annoying things that I do (according to my wife, anyway). Are you guilty of any of these crimes against your beloved spouse?
1) Painting Clutter in Lounge
I am sure that you have something similar to this at home. Look at it! Ancient tubs of paint, their lids askew with dried residue, battered, paint splattered brushes (some with only a single bristle) struggle against the serried ranks of unpainted miniatures. The crooked, ever hot lamp, that stands as a silent sentinel over the collection. Blue tack, tissue paper and the stained mugs in which darkened water slowly evaporates under the lamp's scorching gaze. A smart, woven container sullied with battered boxes and who knows what else. For some reason, your child has added one of his balls to the debris! Note the mess has spread to the poor, innocent window sill too!
Wife's Comment: Where is my phone? That table is supposed to be for the internet router and the cordless telephone, not your miniature's crap! You make more mess than the two year old!
2) Reading material in the toilet
This is pretty good for me actually. We have an old issue of WD there alongside a copy of Warhammer Siege. As we all know, the lavatory is the perfect place to absorb the abundant inspiration our old publications provide in peace. Some may call it skivving (my wife certainly does) but to me, this is the research that is so important to my collection, my painting and, of course, this blog. Depending on which project I am working on, the toilet clutter can vary from a few books to a mighty stack of yellowing tomes that smell reassuringly retro.
Wife's Comment: For God's sake shift those books and old magazines, I am sick of seeing them. I going to stuff them in a black rubbish bag if they are still there tonight! How I am supposed to get to my bathroom scales if they're buried under all that crap!
3) Clothes badly hung (or on floor) but magazines perfectly stacked and well cared for.
I don't think the logic here really needs to be explained. Priorities are just that, after all. Fact is (but don't tell her) the value of the collection of old mags, books and miniatures is so vast that she could happily spend £100s if not £1000s of pounds on clothes and make up if you sold it!
Like you'd do that though, eh?
Wife's Comment: Pick up those bloody shirts off the floor! I spend ages doing the washing and all you do is dump it in that cupboard. If you shifted all that Warhammer crap out of there you'd have more space and you wouldn't have to cram everything inside!
4) Jam jars full of soaking miniatures
One contains Nitro Moors (for superglue carnage) while the others glisten with the insipid brown of dettol. Who knows what leaden classics these jars contain? Both I and they have long forgotten but from time to time, when whim strikes me, I pluck out a miniature or two and clean them in the kitchen sink. As the bubbled, sticky paint dissolves away and swirls to its doom down the plughole it think, oh, I forgot I'd bought that one! Note how my stripping collection shares space with booze and important spices for cooking!
Again, priorities!
Wife's Comment: How many times do I have to tell you that the kitchen is not for all this crap! What happens if one of the children pick up one of the jars and drinks it? And while we're talking about it, what is with all the bloody bases, toothbrushes and smelly glues?
Oh, is that araldite? Could you just fix my broken vase with that please!
5) Malign influence over children
How many toddlers have their own copy of Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay? Mine does! It shares space alongside Winnie the Pooh, The Tweenies and the Gruffalo. And its not like I encouraged it! He loves to flick through the big, battered book and look at all the pictures. Its amazing how fast children can learn; he knows what an orc is, a knight and even a dark elf!
Clever!
Wife's Comment: He'll have nightmares looking at those awful pictures! That book is so unsuitable! If he likes 'little men' when he grows up I'll lock the pair of you in the garden shed!
6) No one can eat on the dinning room table
The warm hum of the scanner as it saves another classic Warhammer title as a sweet pdf ready to share with enthusiasts the world over. The quality printer and scanner combo (homemade by me) and, of course, the stand of literature ready for the 'next blog'. This is our lounge table in all its glory!
Wife's Comment: This first thing I see when I walked into this room is your mess! Why do we have to have the scanner out all of the time? What is with these piles of magazines that are nearly 30 years old!? Where can I eat my slimming world meal in peace? Tidy it up, this second!
7) Endless parcels and packages delivered every morning
There is no greater way of managing the stressful 21st century lifestyle than returning home after a long day at work to find a few brown paper packages waiting with your name on. Tearing off the paper brings a range of different emotions; excitement, inspiration, nostalgia even lust (if its a particularly rare piece of lead) but they all contribute to a slackening of the shoulders, a release of pressure in the head and a general sense of wellbeing. Now, where is my jam jar full of dettol?
Wife's Comment: Its so embarrassing when I have my mothers' coffee afternoons and there is a huge pile of parcels sitting there. They always say, 'he's been on eBay again, hasn't he?' And there's the postman, knocking on the door and getting me to sign all these orange pieces of paper not to mention all these red cards with 'I'm sorry but we missed you' written on them! When will it stop!?
So, its confession time! How many of these are you guilty of? Or, perhaps, you inflict additional spousal crimes with you passion for retro Warhammer and fantasy games?
Orlygg.
Friday, 15 June 2012
Warhammer Third Edition: 10 Things I Love About You!
I have recently been on holiday. Not far, just down to Kent for a few days at a Haven Holiday Camp, so that my very pregnant wife and young son could have a bit of a break. We were really lucky with the weather; warm sunny days, mornings spent swimming, nice food and afternoons where the wife and son slept contentedly for a couple of hours.
During this rare 'freetime', I endeavoured to re-read the Third Edition Rulebook cover to cover. I say re-read, but I am not entirely sure if I have ever actually 'read' it before. Sure, I've flicked through (I've spent 20+ years doing that) and made reference to different rule sections but I cannot actually recall reading the whole book through, cover to cover.
Well, I have just finished it!
Upon completion, I began to ponder on what makes this particular edition so popular. It cannot just be the musing of a few nostalgic old leadheads. A glance at eBay tells a different story. You'd have trouble shifting a copy of 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th or even 8th (recently I've seen the deluxe, limited edition of 8th not selling for £30) but 3rd? Just look at eBay and you'll see what I mean.
Why is this?
That, I think, is an answer best left to the individual. We all appreciate different things about 3rd edition because we are different people. What does surprise me, however, is that there are some gamers who were not even born when the edition was published picking up a copy of the ruleset and having a go.
Strangely, Rick Priestley, one of the authors behind Warhammer, has gone on the record to say (and I paraphrase) that its the edition remembered most fondly but, in his view anyway, the least playable. I can see his point, it can certainly be an unwieldy beast if you are not prepared to do some homework, but that is due to the nature of the beast; having been written alongside a RPG during an age in gaming dominated by RPGs.
So, to me anyway, Warhammer 3rd is more of a RPG Wargame than a straight out the box battle you can be playing in under twenty minutes.
So what are the 10 Things That I Love About Warhammer Third Edition? I listed them below and made an effort to explain my choices. The sections are in no particular order, so don't feel one entry has any preference over any other
10: The Cover
It feel that its fair to say that the cover of Third is the best cover Warhammer has ever had. John Sibbick's work still packs a punch today. The orange, misty battlefield full of strange, mutated creatures fighting amongst themselves. The enigmatic central barbarian (who I have always assumed to be Sigmar) splitting skulls as warriors fight around him. In the distance, obscured by the smoke of battle lurk other, unseen things, hinting at the horror rooted deep inside the Warhammer World. Evocative indeed!
9: Internal Art
Some bloggers have condemned the art in Warhammer Third as being a lazy exploitation of GWs art assets at the time of publication. I disagree with this. Afterall, what is the purpose of GW's art but to illustrate what the Warhammer World looks like. Compare the art with what we have today, eh? Full colour oil paintings, many of which look like the work of old masters, that have a depth and imagination that is sorely lacking from the samey output from the company today. John Blanche's work from the 80s is exceptional in its execution and a real source of inspiration to this day. Then there's the detailed work of Ackland, or the busy linework of Nicolson, or Stephen Tappin... the list goes on and on. The art makes the book a joy to flick through really and everytime you look, you notice something different.
8: Freehacks and Routing
I love the freehack. The fact that you get two when a unit routs can be very destructive. I case you are not aware of what the freehack is, its a rule that sets to represent the carnage inflicted when a unit runs away. These are essentially automatic hits, though you still roll for damage and saving throw. On a good day, these can wreak ruin upon the enemy but also gives a unit more of the chance to rally and reform. I've had a unit routed across the battlefield, seen a number of them fall to freehacks, for the unit to rally, reform and do the same to the enemy!
This was one element of Third I really missed in later editions. I recall playing 5th Edition with my stepbrother soon after its release. I had a unit of Bretonnian Knights and he had a unit of skink archers. For whatever reason, my knights fled and the skinks chased them down a destroyed the whole unit!! WTF!! We just stood there amazed! Like that would happen, eh?
7: Magic
The magic system is totally zany in Third but was designed to be used with the aid of a GM. Some of the spells are absolutely terrifying (Vortex of Chaos, anyone?) but the majority of them are available to all magic users. To me, its the illusions that are so fantastic. Field a unit, march them as normal seeing your opponent react to them. Then, as they charge into close combat you flip over your piece of paper and... it was all an illusion! I also love the rules for magic rings and scrolls. You can kit up your wizards with all kinds of magical mayhem and even supply a spell or two to regular characters.
6: Character Creation
I love the rules about character creation, both for fighters and wizards. This was on of the elements I really enjoyed when re-reading the rules again. This section, though small, really got my creative juices flowing as I set about creating Level 5s, Level 10s, Level 15s and Level 20s. There is such an emphasis on characters being a integral part of the narrative in Third rather than simply just two armies slugging it away via list.
5: Rules for Different Weapons
My regular opponent in all things Third Edition, Dan, loves this section. Full rules from everything for Aquebuses to Morning Stars, and these weapons, they can be given to just about any character or unit within reason. Orcs with blunderbuses? Why not! Pygmies with Double Handed Weapons? Yes Sir! Just about any crazy combination you can dream of! Love this alot!
4: Encumbrance
Equipment, especially armour, weighs you down in Warhammer Third and affects your movement characteristic. This adds a tactical edge that I really appreciate, particularly in Realm of Chaos games where you field mixed units of troops. These rules add to the 'grown' up feel of the ruleset and we stick to them like glue. Its amusing when playing a campaign to end up with a character who cannot actually move due to limb loss and heavy armour!
3: Manoeuvres
If you have played Third then you'll know what I mean by the wheel, wedge or single file manoeuvres. The elaborate movement of units really makes this version of the game what it is. That, coupled with the Reserves phase, makes movement an interesting part of the game.
2: The Bestiary
Pretty much every monster in the game is listed, described with full rules and presented with a points value. So it is possible to play the game WITHOUT having to buy any more books. Sure, Warhammer Armies is useful for the lists but with a little effort, its possible to create a game using the rulebook alone. The descriptions are also rather readable and help give an impression of what the Warhammer World is like. There are also rules for werewolves.
1: Believability
For this section I am going to quote directly from the rulebook.
"Games are always more satisfying when set firmly within the context of a credible society, especially when that society is situated within a carefully detailed world, complete with its own history, geography and political intrigues."
You'll find this quote on p.189.
Its a shame that GW forgot about this one, isn't it?
Well there is my list. Have you got anything else to add about Third Edition?
Orlygg.
Thursday, 14 June 2012
Dioramadrama: Rogue Trader Old School Stuff
I've given up!
I'm going have to collect Rogue Trader too. Quite where that will fit into the 'grand plan', who knows!?
These dioramas are tipped me over the edge. The John Blanche diorama I posted earlier got a fantastic response, and I'd found these alongside it, so I have decided to post them too.
Fantastic aren't they?
Again, I'm letting the models speak for themselves.
However, I'm not one hundred percent who they are by. Gut instinct says Mike McVey but if you know different please comment and give us the full facts.
Orlygg.
I'm going have to collect Rogue Trader too. Quite where that will fit into the 'grand plan', who knows!?
These dioramas are tipped me over the edge. The John Blanche diorama I posted earlier got a fantastic response, and I'd found these alongside it, so I have decided to post them too.
Fantastic aren't they?
Again, I'm letting the models speak for themselves.
However, I'm not one hundred percent who they are by. Gut instinct says Mike McVey but if you know different please comment and give us the full facts.
Orlygg.
Dioramadrama: John Blanche's Undead Assault, Mid 80s.
Good morning (or indeed afternoon, or even evening, depending on where you are) and welcome back to my blog.
Only a quick post today as I've got loads to do, including trying to get my wolf riders finished, as what with all this scanning I'm not getting much painting done! I just started to write a couple of more 'scholarly' posts about our period but they may be some time to complete, if at all, really. During my research, I stumbled across a couple of sites that had some excellent images and resources on them.
This one I just had to share.
I've never been to Warhammer World; I always wanted to go there when I returned to GWplc hobby in 2004. The gaming, the shopping and of course, the hall of miniatures... I binned 'official' GW late July last year and these days it would just be the miniatures that would draw me in; if I happened to be in Nottingham and had nothing to do, I'd visit!
I don't know if this is still on display there; its the undead diorama as seen on page 180-181 of the 3rd edition rulebook by John Blanche. Mid 80s.
Mind-blowing, isn't it?
I'll let the images speak for themselves.
Big thanks to Mabden for the images.
Orlygg.
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